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| サッカーへ行く前の空、その後土砂降りに Suddenly had heavy rain after this view b4 go2 soccer |
さて今日のフットサルは、相手は島内でも強く大会があるといつも上位にいるチームで北マリアナ代表チームのメンバーもいるチームだった。しかし、５対５の引き分けに終わった。追いつき追い越されで白熱した試合だった。勝ちはしなかったが結果的には勝ちに等しいと思う。私は仕事で少し遅れて会場についた、前半の途中から試合に参加した。前回は他のチームに７-１大敗した我がチームだったが、今日はJIMMYさんも加わり全体的に守備を重視しながら、お互いを見ながらパスをつなぐという基本であるが忠実に守っての内容で、やはり守備にすきを与えると、強いチームだすそこから得点された場面もあった。ここ数試合の私はどうも調子が今一つでていない、ここ１年を振り返ってみても体が痛くない日が無い、どこかに痛みがあったり、怪我をしていたり、昨年から始めたランニングで持久力は比較的負けないくらいになったが、２月の骨折からどうも体をかばう、いや、かばってしまう自分がいるのに試合中でもよく気付く。確かに、仕事もしているので、趣味が原因で怪我をしてではまずいから昔のようにとはいかないのはわかる。もちろん体力的に他の選手に劣る事もわかる、が、そんなことよりも精神的というのか気分的に何か負けているような気がしてならない。試合でも後半にもう一度コートに入るように言われた（ルールで自由に選手の入れ替えが出来る）が、１人若い選手がまだ一度もこの試合に出ていなかったので、彼に出るように譲った。その後も交代の機会があったが私は出なかった。チームが勝利する事の方が優先すると思ったし、まず私自身に何か踏み出せない物があったような気がする。もちろん出たい気持ちは強いがその気持ちを押さえるものだから、かなり強い何かが。私はさいたま市（私は旧与野市）で育った。サッカーも強い地域でプロや代表に行っている選手も同じ中学からもまた他校でもいる。私の中学はそれでも市内では一番弱かったのが、私達の代で１番になった。小学校では全国大会に出たりなどあったが、中学では他の小学校の上手な生徒も同じに中学になり私は３年の最後で何とかＡチームで補欠から試合に出れるようになった。途中いろいろとありかなりそれた時期が続いていたにもかかわらず、昔からの上手な友達がたまたま家にいる時は、いつも誘ってくれて練習したりして、先輩も後輩もなくやった。根はサッカーが好きだったので、そしてサッカーの友達も好きだったので続けられていたと思う。また、自分自身が補欠と言う身分を知っているから、試合に出れない人の気持はよくわかるし、人一倍試合に出たいという気持ちもよくわかる。
話はそれたけど、だからなぜ今日は貪欲にその後、再び試合に出なかったのか？精神的にやはりここらが限界と思ってしまっているのか、４０歳過ぎた人がやるものではないのかなと、ふと思う時がある。それに特別な体のケア―などしていないし（プロではないし）ただ、今サッカーをやり始めて、体力の無さ、技術力の衰えを感じながらもやっているのは、光太郎にめげずに続けてほしいという今迄の私の人生上において考えた事も、もったこともなかった「親心」から続けているところが大きい。もちろん好きだし、チームメイトに会うのは楽しいが、試合で活躍できなくなってお荷物にまでなり、チームにいて無理に出場する位ならばきれいさっぱりやめた方がいい。ただ、光太郎がせっかく４歳から始めて興味を持ち、やっている彼のサッカーに泥はぬりたくない、だから、出来るうちは続けたい。やるなら、しっかりとやりたいと思っているだけです。なのに、精神的に何か弱くなっている自分がわからない、だからプレーをしていてもさえない。何か深みにはまっています。
あ～もう一度、１０代に戻れれば…（無理ですね）
Japan seems to have won South Korea by 3-0. It often held out because the game was not able to be seen though it was information only on the internet.
Well, even the team in today's futsal where the member of the north Mariana varsity existed in the team that always existed in the high rank, too, when there was strongly a rally. However, it ended in the tie of 5-5. It was a game candescent because of the catching up outstripping. It thinks consequentially equal to the win though it did not win. I participated in the game on the way in the first half having attached to the hall a little delaying because of my work. There was a scored scene in other team there putting out a strong team, too, the tie of passing seeing each other while valuing the defense as Mr. JIMMY also joined and it was the overall today last time when becoming empty was given to the defense still by the content that defended faithfully though it was my team 7-1 crushing defeats though it was basic.
the pain very protects the body from the fracture in February, and I notices somewhere well while unpleasant and even playing a game though I did protects my self though the game. it became no defeat comparatively because of running started last year endurance not going out of one condition now, and there is no day when the body is not painful even if looking back on this year.
Certainly, it injures because of the hobby and I should not happen the situation because I have a work.I understood that I can't play soccer like before when I was teenage. A thing inferior of course physically to other players is understood. The team asked me that enter the court again in the second half (It is possible to replace it by the rule freely of the player) is one person younger had never gone out for this game, the game was transferred to go out to him. I did not go out though afterwards, there was a chance of the alternation. It was thought that the thing that the team wins gave priority, and thinks that there is a thing that I cannot step forward something by me. Because it is the one to suppress the feelings, something considerably strong though feelings that go out of course are strong.
I grew up in Saitama City (I am in Yono City). It is also in a player who has gone to the professional(JPN National team or J-League) in a strong region in soccer, the same junior high school, and another school.My junior high school weakness in the city even so became the first by our time. Though there were going out in the elementary school to nationwide Championships in Japan.
A good student player at other elementary schools thoroughly became a same junior high school student. and I came to manage to take part in the game from the alternate in A team at the end of three years. When a good friend from old times was in the house by chance on the way though the deflecting time continued variously the cover, it always invited, there were neither a senior nor a junior by practicing, and it did. Because the friend of the favor of soccer and soccer liked it, I think the root to have been continued. Moreover, feelings of the person who cannot take part in the game are understood well, and I understand feelings that it wants to go out to play a game more than others well because it knows the position called oneself is an alternate.
Therefore, why did not today take part in the game again avariciously afterwards? It is still mentally thought that here are limits or I occasionally suddenly think whether it is what the person who passed at the age of 40 does though it doesn't know. Doing though it is about physical strength and failing of technology are felt because it begins to play soccer now is large continue the thing about which it thinks on my life of wanting you to continue not to be discouraged because of Kohtaro until now from "Parental love" that had not had it. I should quite play soccer in my team, if people still ask me to play on the game with sympathize because I don't want to be a burden on the team even.
It becomes impossible to take an active part in the game, and it is up to a spare prick, and it is in the team and if it is a place by which it participates forcibly, you should stop it ..nice-looking.. neatly though meeting the teammate is happy the of course favor. However, it doesn't want to disturb of man who starts from four years old by Kohtaro with great pains, is interested, and is doing, and, therefore, I want to continue while being possible to do. I want only to do firmly if it does. Nevertheless, we who have weakened some do not understand mentally, and, therefore, it is dull even if it plays. It waits in some depths.
If it is possible to return in my teens again … (It is impossible. )
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